A happy marriage makes the life heaven whereas a bad marriage or a failed marriage can make the life hell. Do you also wish to know the Secrets of Successful Marriage?
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A happy marriage is not necessarily the outcome of relationship advice received from a counselor or the result of some online marriage counseling or marriage therapy alone. There are many successful or happy marriages where the couples have never felt the need to go for any marriage therapy or formal relationship advice or online marriage counseling and have picked up tips by simply observing other happily married couples, attending seminars and events together and by reading books on the subject. A happy marriage could also be the result of the above habits combined with the couple’s own hit and trial methods to learn the art of living together happily where there is no need for any marriage therapy, online marriage counseling or relationship advice from an expert.
Secrets of Successful Marriage
Every marriage, including a happy marriage, has its share of ups and downs. It is not that in a happy marriage, the two partners are ideal human beings. They too fight, often over trivial matters, but they don’t allow the friction to become too much of a permanent problem for them. So, there is no need for any marriage therapy to tide over this small problem. Even during some online marriage counseling sessions, the counselors advise the couples that a little bit of difference of opinion, stress and conflict are healthy for their relationship but these should not be allowed to become too big or too frequent.
We shall briefly talk here about some of the key secrets of a successful marriage that you can follow in order to have a long and happy marriage where you and your spouse never feel the need to go for any marriage therapy, relationship advice from a counselor or even an online marriage counseling, which have all become quite common now a days:
1. Accept your Spouse the Way He or She is
You married your spouse for what he or she was at that time. You will do well to accept your spouse the way he or she is now. Remember, the way it will not be easy for you to change now, so is the case with your spouse too.
Know for sure that people rarely change. However, as time goes by, you may get a bit better in managing your shortcomings. In a happy marriage, the partners learn to cope up with each other’s flaws by devising suitable strategies together. This can either be your own decision or may be the result of relationship advice received from others or during marriage therapy or online marriage counseling sessions. Learn to always look at the positive attributes of your spouse.
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2. Never take your Spouse for Granted
Even if yours is a happy marriage, don’t ever take your spouse for granted. It is human nature to get a bit complacent when a relationship is comfortable for a long time. However, you must never take your spouse for granted and must respect him or her at all times, no matter what!
3. Communicate under all Circumstances
One relationship advice that is often given to couples for a happy marriage is that they must always keep their communication channels open. Even after a tiff, never stop talking to your spouse. If need be, softly communicate even your anger, hurt and disappointment to your spouse. But do also remember to convey your love, fondness and affection towards him or her despite her flaws. You may soon pave the way for a long and happy marriage.
4. Know your Partner’s Love Language
Every individual has his or her own way to express love, affection and fondness for others. Acknowledge your partner’s love gestures and reciprocate his or her feelings suitably.
5. Find some time for yourself and let your Spouse too have some ‘Me Time’
To have a happy marriage, find some exclusive time for yourself to pursue your hobbies or just to ponder over your spiritual side or to assess your goals and achievements. This way, you will also give some personal and exclusive time to your spouse to contemplate on many personal matters. And do remember the age old relationship advice that ‘absence makes the heart grow fonder’.
6. Never try to Control your Spouse
Couples who go for relationship advice from a counselor or seek online marriage counseling or marriage therapy are often asked if they try to exercise too much control over each other or if one of them is trying to control the other partner. If allowed to remain unchecked, this tendency to control can spoil any happy marriage. So, if you sense that this is the case, it is time for you to go for relationship advice from a family counselor.
7. Add Romance to your Happy Marriage
Small acts such as watching the sunset or enjoying the rain together, surprising your spouse with his favorite meal and giving a flower to your spouse do add romance to your happy marriage. A candle light dinner or a movie or even a long stroll together could also make your happy marriage happier!
8. Keep your Intimacy Alive
Sex is critically important for a healthy and happy marriage. Keep it regular, interesting and exciting, even if you do not feel particularly inclined for it or are not in a mood for the act.
9. Learn to ‘Agree to Disagree’
A common relationship advice given to couples during marriage counseling for a happy marriage is that they must learn to ‘agree to disagree’. Even in case of divergent views, it is not necessary that one of the two partners would be either right or wrong. Take the case where one person says that the glass is half empty while the other says that it is half-full. Undoubtedly, both of them are right.
Remember, “A happy marriage is one in which either spouse grants the possibility that the other may be right, though neither believes it!”
10. Look for the ‘Soft Emotion’ behind the ‘Hard Emotion’ of Anger
Psychologists have established that behind every “hard” emotion, there is a “soft” one. If you are indeed looking to have a happy marriage and have the maturity to do your bit, look for the soft emotion such as disappointment, sadness or even jealousy behind the hard emotion of anger, which is being used unknowingly to mask the soft emotion. Though easier said than done, this act will equip you to empathize with the true emotions of your spouse in case of any fight or disagreement.
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